It’s been sort of a rough week. My good friend Robert, who sold bread with his wife Joan at the booth next to mine at the farmer’s market, passed away on Sunday. Visitation was yesterday, and the funeral was this morning. It was a military funeral at Ft. Leavenworth National Cemetery, complete with bagpipes, the 21-gun salute, and the playing of Taps. Very moving. Joan read a short poem about being a military wife, but no one spoke about who Robert really was.

I knew him the last five years of his life. He was funny, hard-working, and usually ornery. My first memory of him was my first year at the market when I started out with a cardboard table I had borrowed from my neighbor, with a plastic tablecover and about five different kinds of soaps in various sizes. Robert and Joan had their booth on the opposite end of the market then, and he came over and asked if I would like to buy a tent that was still in the box for $20. (He was a car salesman at the time.) As a market newbie, I knew I needed a tent, but I certainly didn’t have $100 or more to buy a new one, so this sounded like a great deal! And it was – for the first year. The entire frame of the tent had to be assembled and disassembled every week from about 40 different poles and pieces!

Robert had some great lines for selling their bread:

“We use the magic oven on Fridays. It takes all the calories out.”

and

“We bake all our bread with non-fat hot air.”

He and Joan also sold homemade dog biscuits. Inevitably, someone would ask, “Are these for dogs?” To which he would reply,

“Or for you (or your husband) if you’re (he’s) in the dog house.”

Robert’s job was to make the dog biscuits and Joan baked all of the bread up until this year when she had hip replacement surgery. Then Robert took over most of the baking until she was feeling better and able to get around the kitchen again. No one could tell the difference.

For the last three years, we have been neighboring vendors, and Robert was always the first one to come help me with my [new EZ-Up] tent as soon as I arrived in my spot at the market. Around the middle of this summer, he started having health issues again. I have visited him in the hospital three times in the past three years, and got a chance to see him in the last few weeks of his life as he was cared for by Joan and hospice in his home. Our last conversation only lasted a few minutes before the morphine kicked in and he fell asleep, but he was asking how my husband’s business was doing.

This is how I will remember him though:

Joan is at the top of my prayer list right now. She’s a very strong woman, but I know this is very hard on her. I just want to be a good friend in the days, weeks, months, and years ahead. She’s still deciding whether or not she will return to the market next year. Whether she does or doesn’t, I just want to be there for her.

Update: Joan surprised all of us at the farmer’s market this morning by showing up and handing out the programs from the funeral and giving out hugs. She is an amazing lady!

It was rather chilly this morning and one of the vendors had on a coat that she hadn’t worn since last Spring. When she stuck her hand in the pocket, she found the handkerchief that Robert had given her the last time she wore the coat. She was able to give it back to Joan this morning. Wow.